C. Franz and the Wacky Things He Says

The Swift Boat Captains for Truth are after me. Seems like I didn't deserve the medals I earned during the Vietnam War - When I was in my mother's womb! in my mother's womb I chased an injured Charley rocket-propelled grenade launcher haflway up my mother's fallopian tube and shot him mercilessly dead. We had made a pledge that if we had encountered any black pyjama-clad VC in the uterine environment, we would turn in and fight them. But some of the other swift boat captains - who were not in my mother's womb at the time - say that I shouldn't have gotten the medals that i received. They are a bunch of dry humps.